Touching base

It has been many months since I stopped in and posted something.  We are all doing okay.  Our two other dogs have in their own ways moved on, although there are times when we see changes in them — things that are just a bit different from when Kai was still alive.  Our female shepherd, Elli, seems to have stepped up into the role of “top dog.”  There are many times I see her in a certain light or doing something and I see Kai in her.  It is painful, but at the same time comforting.  She has really tried her hardest to fill in the void.

I have gone back and forth trying to decide whether I should share my last day with Kai with all of you.  Part of me thinks it may help others, but then I feel like it may be gruesome and off-putting to others.  Ultimately, death is part of life so a post could happen about it or I may just keep that very private moment in my life and his to myself.



Kai became a part of our family in the Spring.  April 6, 2002 to be exact.  I remember the day well.  Mark had called a few days before to talk to our landlord to see if it would be okay if he got me a dog for my birthday.  She agreed!

As humans new to the dog-owning business, we didn’t really do any research.  I know that is hard to believe because both of us are research fiends when it comes to most things.  In this case, we just ended up at a local petstore and saw our very first White German Shepherd.  We were sold in an instant.   We grabbed a leash, a collar and our new puppy and went home to play.  It was a long, great day.  Somewhere in there we bought a crate, bowls, toys and food.  I don’t remember much of that kind of stuff.  What I do remember is having this sweet little boy looking at us and the years that same sweet boy belonged to us and us to him.

It is hard not to be reminded of him daily, but this time of year is so very bittersweet.  The painful tears come when they want to, but they are also mixed with wonderful memories.  I have been dreaming about him although he never makes an appearance.  In one dream, I am calling for him and then realize he is dead and calling will do no good.  I know it is silly, but I would like to see him in a dream so I can pet him and tell him how much I love him.

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