Time moves on

Time does move on, but I still think about Kai constantly.  People always say that things will get better.  Certainly, I am not crying every minute of every day, but the pain in our hearts is still there.  Things aren’t better, we just are forced to think about other things.  I guess I just don’t like the saying “things will get better.”  Better would be my dog back in our lives for another 8 years with his health.

Kai seemed to be the heart of the pack.  Anna, our Siberian Husky and Elli, our female German Shepherd just seem so much more subdued.  The house is quieter.  Our ever alert boy is no longer here to get the masses riled up to protect our house from squirrels, dogs and bunnies.  He is no longer grabbing a toy to play with and bringing in the other dogs for a bit of a chase and tug of war.  It is strange that our cat, Jester, is the loudest animal in the house now.

We have had a few beautiful days with temperatures in the 60s.  The snowy icy mess outside is disappearing.  Spring will be here soon and while I am relieved, there is a sadness to it all as Kai loved to be outside sitting in the sun.  Each day I am outside walking with Elli or Anna I think to myself, “Kai would love today.”

The picture above is of Kai in April 2002 when he joined our family.  He was learning to use the stairs for the first time and needed to be coaxed a bit.

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Every day is a challenge

It has been almost 12 weeks.  Three months.  I can’t even believe it.  There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think about Kai.  I think initially there was the disbelief that at 8 years old he would be taken from us.  Now there is just the anguish that I will never see him again.  It may be hard for those that don’t have pets to understand how deep a loss like this is.  Imagine that a devoted friend that has been at your side for 8 1/2 years through all the happiness and disappointments is now gone. 

It is hard to forget his final moments.  Maybe some day I will tell you about them.

His birthday was on January 30th.

Goodbye my sweet boy!

Not going to type out a long post today because it is just too painful.  Kai passed away on Tuesday, November 16th.  He was at home with me so there is some comfort in him not dying alone.  He will be severely missed and I hope that someday I will have the privilege of seeing him again.

There will be more on this blog in time, but for now our family is grieving the loss of such a sweet and tender dog.

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